We are a thirsty people! Fortunately Nestlé, one of the world’s most profitable corporations, lovingly offers us its wholesome waters. Pumped straight from drought-ridden California, their thirst-quenching bottles of water are crisp and clear…with a refreshing aftertaste of bribery and deforestation.
“Under the influence of politicians, masses of people tend to ascribe the responsibility for wars to those who wield power at any given time. In World War I it was the munitions industrialists; in World War II it was the psychopathic generals who were said to be guilty. This is passing the buck. The responsibility for war falls solely upon the shoulders of these same masses of people, for they have all the necessary means to avert war in their own hands. In part by their apathy, in part by their passivity, and in part actively, these masses of people make possible the catastrophes under which they themselves suffer more than anybody else. To stress this guilt on the part of masses of people, to hold them solely responsible, means to take them seriously. On the other hand, to commiserate masses of people as victims, means to treat them as small, helpless children.”
(Wilhelm Reich, The Mass Psychology of Fascism, 1946)
In this age of terror, it seems there’s a new school shooting every week in the USA. Can’t anything be done to protect the children? Thanks to new exciting technology seen below, the answer is YES!
Remember, a classroom with a loaded gun is a safe and happy classroom!
We salute the beautifully generic values found in the ads of all the wonderfully generic companies. They really are improving the world.
Originally expressed as poetry by Kendra Eash in McSweeney’s.
“Today, the United States is No. 1 in billionaires, No. 1 in corporate profits, No. 1 in CEO salaries, No. 1 in childhood poverty and No. 1 in income and wealth inequality in the industrialized world.”
U.S. Senator Bernie Sanders from Vermont
Meat Knows Best.
Let’s conduct an experiment. You and a million other young men are playing Halo 3, a popular first-person shooter video game. Only you have chosen to use “xxxGayBoyxxx” as your gamer tag. What could possibly be the response?
Another admirable investigation into primate behavior in America.
Sure, terrible things go on in this world, but look at the bright side — 3.5 billion people live in poverty! Capitalist and all around idiot Kevin O’Leary leads the cheers.
“Television has attacked us for a lifetime, now we strike back.”
(Nam June Paik)
Consider the plight of our earth. Isn’t it clear? Our children need great Christian superheroes. That’s where Bibleman comes in. He’s a lean, mean religious fighting machine and his sacred team will defeat the Evil “Wacky Protester.” Click here to see the exciting trailer! Not only that, you can purchase action figures here. Thank God for Bibleman!